TinaCortina's Blog

Musings of a Tgirl

Paris and Beyond!

Well Paris came and went.  Well I did go, but in the end Tina chose not to.  I know, how can you possibly give up the chance, especially when your wife has said it is OK, to dress in the capital city of France, one of my favourite places?  Well no excuses, but the last 3 or 4 months have passed me by. Work hard, play hard should be the ethic, well its been more like work hard, too tired to play hard………so folks, Tina has been forgotten.

Is it just me?   I mean when you are so wrapped up in one activity that you determine the time to get up as the moment that your brain starts thinking about work, well that is how it has been.  My motto has been that if I’m thinking about work I might as well go there.  My office is only 10 minutes away and I have been there at 6 or 7 most mornings over the last few months more times than I can remember.  My ‘normal time to leave is between 6-7 in the evening, but often it has been much later.  Weekends too if nothing specific is booked.  Today is a ‘delightful’ exception which is why for the first time in a long time I have had time to even consider writing a blog.  It’s funny though, but the inspiration for this blog, came from the fact that I’ve some free loft insulation coming Tuesday and I had to clear the loft.  Mentally that was a ‘big task’ so I kept the today (Saturday) free and didn’t even consider going to the office.  Wow ~ luxury!

Well I awoke as usual around 6 and was up and about before 7.  I brought my wife some cereal and thought I ought to try on all the clothes that came for my birthday, which was a week and a half back.  Well at least so we knew they fit and the receipts could be thrown away.  3 short-sleeved shirts, a polo golf top, 2 pairs of golf trousers and some tailored shorts which I am expected to wear on holiday in September with all the family (some hope, with my knees?  Ok in a skirt, but shorts!!!!!!!!!  Yuk!).  As you may be able to tell, I don’t buy many clothes for myself!

Anyway that still left a skirt and girly top, birthday pressie from my wife, to try on but we will leave that for another occasion as we are both full of cold.

So anyway, Saturday morning, some jobs to do.  I decide to tackle the damp patches in our lounge…….it’s not bad but the paint has bubbled and it needed scraping.  Two paint colours needed to be found in the garage, a task in itself as I can never find the right tin.  You see I am a bit of a hoarder in more ways than one (see below!).  Never throw anything out, that’s me.  You never know when it might be useful or even if not, then it can provide a memory and when your memory is not good, I think you like the props that old stuff can provide.

So I knew I had the paint, but I had to open a dozen tins to find the two colours I needed.   At least now all the paint cans are all marked with a big painted X on the lid, so it should be easier next time!  Anyway, when I had eventually finished that task,  I tackled the loft.  Now we are fortunate to have quite a large home and the loft so I’m told is 50 sq metres.  Well I guess not much more than a 6th of that is boarded but it is amazing how much junk you can fit up there.  This should have been an opportunity to get it all down and throw most of it out!

There are 4 or 5 boxes and sundry bags of Christmas decoration which I will keep even though it is far too much.  There were 5 pairs of ski’s, a snowboard and several pairs of ski boots and couple of suitcases of ski clothes.  Sundry other suitcases, some full some not.  A tent and a rucksack that I took around Europe when I was 21!   Dozens of boxes of old school books, university books ~ mostly mine but some belong to the kids.  I don’t just mean the text books, I still have the exercise books full of my maths calculus and french and german translations of when I was in the 6th form 30 years ago………why why why?  I’ve boxes of Christmas cards/valentines cards. anniversary cards from 20/30 even more years ago.  Letters even from past girl friends.  I found my wife’s coming of age cards 18th and 21st from her parents!  A world cup souvenir edition from 1966 when I was 12 and England won it.  Old cups and silverware, nothing valuable.  Nostalgia, that’s all.

There was my wifes wedding dress and veil in a very old suitcase with rusted locks.  I brought it down and unfortunately the rust had got onto the dress which my wife is now trying to clean off.  There were other clothes and shoes of my wife’s, some in plastic bags, other in boxes so big I could barely lift.   I’m thinking I must have worn some of them, haha.  Now why didn’t I throw them away!!   I particularly remember a pair of shoes and some red boots, 3 sizes too small that I once squeezed into (after she had thrown away, I might add).  I know there is a locked LP case (remember those?) of old magazines, such as Forum where I first read of cross-dressing husbands and felt that well it might be rare, but I’m not the only one.

So going into the loft did bring back memories of Tina (along with a lot of other things!).

A lot of the stuff will get thrown now, but I will keep the old school books and the cards and letters for a bit longer.

I’m grateful that it gave me the impetus and I now have the time to write a few things here.

Yes it was a shame about Paris, but I had my chance and I guess I blew it, although it was a really great trip anyway.  We were only going from Saturday to Monday, driving through the Eurotunnel under the channel, then about 3 hours the other side to Paris.  My wife A-M and I had agreed that Tina could appear all day Sunday, which had seemed very reasonable as we wouldn’t be getting there till Saturday lunchtime and would be leaving on Monday.   But earlier in the week, I was tired and too lethargic to think about what clothes to take, and just to think exactly how we were going to do it.  Friday, I made the choice not to pack any clothes and dropped a note to our friends Astrid and Sandra that Tina wouldn’t be appearing.

We were staying right in the heart of Paris in the Rue De Rivoli, half a mile from Notre Dame in one direction, half a mile from the Louvre in another.  Our friend Astrid would be dressing anyway and did from Saturday evening and all day Sunday. In the end, it was boiling hot on the Sunday, so I may not have enjoyed it as I don’t really like the sun when wearing a wig….but Astrid managed OK and good for her.  Saturday night we had walked all around the Notre Dame and ate locally.   On Sunday, we did the Batobus on the River Seine up to the Eiffel Tower and on to the Trocadero and back down to some gardens.  In the evening, up to Montmartre where we ate and the Sacre Coeur, with a fantastic view over nighttime Paris.  Taxi back then a last drink or two at a bar close to the hotel.  Astrid enjoyed herself and maybe I would too.  But I think when you are exhausted you sometimes can’t cope with decisions outside the ‘main domain’ and I think it would just have been too much hassle.  So as I say Paris came and went but Tina didn’t go and really she hasn’t had a look in for as long as I can remember.  My choice.  C’est la vie.

You can’t do everything.  You have to make choices in life.  And you can have no regrets.

But I have managed to fit things in recent months besides work.  We’ve had friends come to stay.  We’ve been out for some nice meals.  I’ve been on a golfing holiday (another long weekend to France, near Le Touquet).  I got drenched one day and came back exhausted.  This was all about 2 weeks ago, which I think is why I have the cold now, which of course I passed on ~ so not popular on that front!

But over the last 6 weeks or so, I’ve also had two trips up to Shropshire to see my daughter and son-in-law.  Very important trips as they have given us our first grand-child, a bouncing, (do they really bounce?) bonny boy Joshua.  And very proud I have been too, to hold and snuggle a new-born, to be reminded of memories past of the births of our own 3 children.   The first time I held him he was just 8 hours old even though we are 3 hours away and again this week, I was able to manufacture a work trip and stay over.  Now 6 weeks old, eyes wide open this time, but still lovely to hold.  Wonderful memories to cherish and now we move on to another generation.  In September, ‘God Willing’ we will be going to Brittany (again in France, as you can tell I do like it), with FOUR generations of my family.  There will be 10 of us.  My wife and I, our 3 children, with partners/husband, + baby Josh and my favourite father-in-law Cyril, who continues to amaze at a very sprightly 86!

So not much time for Tina.  But heh, it’s not bothering me.  It’s not gone away.  Well, temporarily, the urge to dress and express myself may not be as strong as it has been at times.  But if you don’t have time then your life is full.  Having the work now, means my business will last for a few years yet, I hope not always at this pace, but it is what I want.  There will be other times for Tina.  And maybe Tina will have time to pass by with others once again, but for a while yet she will be a background secretive person, haha.  The pic was from 30 April at home, which I think is the last time I dressed!

Hope all is well in everyone’s world.

Hugs TinaCortina x

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June 18, 2011 - Posted by | musings of a tgirl | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

8 Comments »

  1. Happy belated Birthday and congratulations on being grandparents. Wow so much going on I can see why you have been so quiet in your blog and not had time to enjoy being Tina.
    I know what you mean about hot weather and a wig but for me even more then the wig is my makeup. I do not like the feel of sweating while wearing makeup. As a guy I would just wipe the sweat away but as a girl that would also wipe away all my makeup so I try to avoid sweating as Susan.

    Take care and enjoy the new grandchild.
    Hugs
    Susan

    Comment by susanmiller64 | June 18, 2011 | Reply

    • Hi Susan, thanks for your reply, you are also right about the make-up. I really don’t like excessive heat in male or female guise. I’d also like to say that I’ve missed your blog more than any while I’ve been away, because you live life to the full but embrace your femininity as Susan in such a regular way. I hope I can start visiting regularly again before too long. Hugs Tina x

      Comment by TinaCortina | June 18, 2011 | Reply

  2. Wow! I wondered why the absence. Now I know! Too much work it seems has knocked the stuffing out of you. You have been busy haven’t you? Nice that your business is thriving though. What a shame you hadn’t the energy, inclination, desire…blah, blah, blah to invite Tina to Paris, definitely a missed opportunity. When you get the time you should treat yourself. Hey, good news about your new grandchild, I am going to become a grandmother around 25th Decdember too. Not sure whether ‘Great Aunt’ might be more suitable though! I’ve not seen many folk with three grandmas! LOL.
    Shirley Anne xxx

    Comment by Shirley Anne | June 19, 2011 | Reply

    • Hi Shirley Anne, Yes away for a long time I know. It is easing off a little now fortunately, but I am glad that it guarantees I shall still be here in a year or too. Too young to retire! A treat sounds like a good idea. Not sure yet, but definitely something to follow up. I’m glad too of your own news. It definately gives you a shot in the arm, so I hope all goes well! Hugs Tina x

      Comment by TinaCortina | June 24, 2011 | Reply

  3. Well, well, well Tina! I am surprised at you passing up a chance like that! Still, Paris is fascinating enough as it is and needs no jazzing up so I’m sure you had a great time as not-Tina. 😉

    Of course the really monumental news in there is the bit about the first grandchild! Wow. There’s a milestone if ever there was one. I can’t imagine what that feels like, but I gues I’ll find out sooner or later. I suppose it could – technically – be as little as 9 months away, but hopefully not! =-O

    Like you, I am ridiculously busy at the moment and hardly enough time to sleep or eat, let alone gad about in fine clothes. What’s worse is I can’t see an end to it. Looks like I’m stuck with the same client and insane demands until at least the end of this year. Pffff!

    Look fwd to seeing you before too many months have passed by. Whatever happens, I’ll be out as Penny in September of October so let’s stay in touch.

    Comment by dimorphism | June 19, 2011 | Reply

    • Hi P, Thanks for dropping by! Yes big news on both counts! Maybe I put the Paris thing down to summer blues; I just don’t like the heat, so a trip out in the Autumn sounds great! Hugs Tina x

      Comment by TinaCortina | June 24, 2011 | Reply

  4. Oh I have missed Tina too, very honest account of what has been going on and I know how hard you have been working.
    Sure Tina will be back soon and we can have some fun time together, in the meantime, we are both enjoying our lovely little Grandson and special times with our friends and family. xx

    Comment by AM | June 23, 2011 | Reply

    • Quite right. I’m a spontaneous person, so I just like to do what feels right, and at the moment family comes tops! Hugs Tina x

      Comment by TinaCortina | June 24, 2011 | Reply


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